Homophobia Aug 27, 2020 16:05:26 GMT
Post by Susan Peabody on Aug 27, 2020 16:05:26 GMT
“So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other.” John 13:34
“But Ruth replied, Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if even death separates you and me.” When Naomi realized that Ruth was determined to go with her, she stopped urging her. Ruth 1.
I joined the Seventh Day Adventist Church in the 1980's to help my daughter care for my granddaughter. I agreed with the tenents, but not with the traditions which included homophobia and sexism. Still, I was baptized and happy.
In 2008, I was a volunteer at a nursing home. This is where I met Sandra. She was beautiful, kind, generous and lived in pain because of broken back and the loss of her right leg.
Sandra and I really got to know each other over the next few months, and I was very fond of her. One day she was late for our meeting and I was nervous. When she finally arrived my heart skipped a beat. I loved to look and her and our goodbye hugs were so satisfying.
Within a few months I realized that I had crossed a forbidden and invisible line that I did not coming. I was in love with Sandra. I had romantic, but not sexual feelings, for my friend.
I was fifty six at the time and it just so happened that I had never had anyone love me. Even my mother often told me she did not like me. So I was thrilled when Sandra confessed that she loved me too.
We were so happy that I wanted to tell the world. My first stop was my pastor. I just assumed he would be happy for me. He was not. He told me my feelings were like Eve taking the forbidden fruit. My feelings, he said, were wrong and they were a sin.
The next thing I knew my daughter asked me to come into the church for a family conference. When we met I was told that I could never see my grandchildren again if I did not give Sandra up. I offered to keep the relationship a secret and my daughter said, “You can’t hide your feelings mom. You radiate love for this woman. You can see it all over your face.”
So here I was faced with a choice between the love of a woman and the love of my daughter. I chose Sandra and we were together until she committed suicide. But not before I was shunned by the church.